I remember it so well to this day! it was oct 16th, late in the evening, i was still torn about a relationship that had lasted for a little over a year and had been over for almost a year at this point, but she had me so torn i couldn't get over it and had tried to cover my pain by finding as many online relationships as i could hoping that it would keep me to busy to think or feel anymore, i was in my email when i got an instant message from one of the girls i was interested in, calling for me to come see her in a room she was in, but i hadn't been in a chat room for a few months and really didnt feel like going in to hear the meaningless chit chat of other chatters that always did nothing but take up my time and leave me feeling more lost than b4, but she was so insistant that i finaly relented and came into the room. when i entered, the girl that invited me in welcomed me and then started chatting with others, barely speaking to me despite my efforts to get her to talk,(perhaps she was suddenly shy at my actually coming in or she just couldnt think of anything to say i don't know) but after about ten minutes i was growing tired of it and was about to leave when i seen this nick come in and ask out in the room where she ended up at, i thought, oh she's either being funny or a newby to the internet, in either case i thought she really wasn't looking for an answer so i did not reply and felt someone else would tell her and she would pop off as i had seen many people do before. But after her 3rd attempt at asking the question and no one answering i figured what the heck and told her the room she was in, then she thanked me and explained why she was confused, it seems the irc she was using was supposed to take her to a whole nother server and room but somehow landed her there in that room, and i explained i hadn't been in chat in months and we both agreed it was a pretty far shot at us having both been there at the same time at that moment! I have been around the net enough to know that if someone doesnt have a picture of themselves to send it's a 90% chance they either are hiding something, a player, or just not worth getting to know for one reason or another, so i always make it a point to ask for a picture and if they don't have one i dont try to get to know them any further, but as luck would have it she just happened to have had one done that morning,(it also gives me a reference for a later date if a relationship develops to know what day we actually met)...well so far neither of us were supposed to be in the room but yet we both were there and at the same time no less. she just happened to have a picture done to meet my personal requirement of weeding out the game player. and she had never before bothered to talk to a male nick more than to say hi but was not popping off to leave me, later i asked her why, and she couldnt answer, she just felt something that intriqued her to stay and talk, well the days passed and we were getting closer and finding that we both had so much in common it was almost like i was talking to a female version of me! i couldnt believe thier was someone so like me out there, and at one point she even got so scared of how close we were getting she took me off her instant message, but i guess i had gotten to her emotions or curiosity enough by then that she couldn't stay away from me and put me back in, at first we both agreed that this would never go further than just online friendship and that we could never meet in real life, but i guess we just were meant to be because despite the distance and the agreement that we both should never be more than friends, she was making me forget the girl i was running from and trying to get through the emotional pain for, out of my system! after almost 2 years! no one was able to do that, but here came this girl from out of nowhere and was doing it so easely in a matter of weeks! this was definatly something i had to check out closer! well the weeks grew into months and neither of us could stay away and we both knew there was no way this could remain as just friendship, and though we both had agreed in the begining that we could never meet, we had met twice in the first two months, we simply had to, it was just too much of desire not to! well it has been 13 months now! And I am now a pennsylvania man living with her and we both have never been more happy in our lives! and to think i wasn't going to go in that room that moment, and she wasn't even trying to go to that server! was it a mistake...or did the keeper of the stars have a hand in it somehow? either way i wouldnt trade a minute of the last 13 months for anything...as for the girl i was trying to get over for alll that time when i met the love of my life...hhhmmm i can't even remember her nick, oh well, all that matters is the nick ang-girl cause thats the one i fell deeply in love with and to this day still do, I need her like the air that i breath and the sun that envelopes my being, she has brought me back the most precious gift of all...myself! I was becoming lost and didnt even realize it, i was something i didnt even know, a player? perhaps! its seems i learned alot of bad things from the girl i was having so much pain from. but now im me again, doing things i enjoy. she even got me back into doing html things and sites which is the very reason for this site, to help others find the real meaning of love and relationships! for an inner peace and help them realize its not all bad on the internet! it's to her i devote this site...thank you ang-girl, you mean the world to me!

Eagleyes1~N~Ang-Girl
11/16/2000